wordt ook in retreat weekend gegeven met mogelijk een combi van
met mogelijke combi´s van
(ook losse sessies mogelijk)
For those of you who are tempted to visit Iboga-
This weekend there was only two other guys there with me, both in for a psycho-
The facilities are quite siple, but the most important rooms, the seremony room and the bedrooms, are really ok.The kitchen is also fine and you are free to eat and drink pretty much what you may find there. They make a point of letting you know that you should feel at home -
The outsides is quite boring, flat, muddy farm-
The Kambo seremony is not obligatory, but they recommand it as it will make room for Iboga to work more smoothly and consentrated on the psycho-
So at around 10 in the morning it was time for Kambo.They do it in the usual seremonial way, with purifying and cleansing of the room and the people, clearing way for the spirit to do its work. You decide for yourself how many dots you want. I went for 7 and so did my german co-
Not so easy for me! After the blood-
The rest of the day we just chilled, read (Tolle's "A New Earth"), meditated, went for a walk and slept a little. I felt gradually better as the day past and after the dutch guy arrived in the evening it was finally time to do the thing we all had come to do.
We took showers and changed into seremonial clothes and Sander and Mike gave us some information on what we could expect. Then we where given a micro-
Back in the house we received the first dose in a seremonial way that was graceful and beautiful. Before that though, we shared our intentions and its really up to yourself how detailed you want to be here. I find it better to be open as i think it helps me not to have hidden anything for the facilitators and fellow travellers. In a way my heart feels more honest and true this way. But this is of cource your own choice.
Then we waited. To pass the time we passed a book and a talking stick around. The book had some 500 spiritual and personal developement questions in it, and each of us opened it randomly and then answer the question we found most difficult. It could be questions like "what do you choose, freedom or safety?", "when do you feel powerless?", "wich of your traits do you value most?" -
20 minutes into the second dose, i started feeling dizzy and asked to be taken to the my bed upstairs. Its good to get up those steep stairs before my ability to walk gets to affected to much (ataxia) and i am happy to finally be in bed, bucket on the floor, ready for whatever comes.The visions start coming and getting more and more intense and before I knew it Mike or Sander is there by my bed with another double-
This firstphaseof the journey is called the deathphase.It lasts for a good 8 hours where you are unable to walk and coordinate your physical body very well. There is also purging going on. Regarding purging, i had only one purge, maybe two hours into it and then some mild neusia later on. As indicated before, i didnt find it physically (or mentally) hard at all to do it. The dutch guy on the other hand, struggled a lot, the whole nigjt trough (he didnt take Kambo, might be a connection). The german actually fell asleep on several occationts trughout the night -
The rest of the deathphase was all about images and visions, they kept coming the whole night, hundreds, some seemingly with no connection to my life, but with relevant teachings, some with very recognizable settings, some I still need time to figure out, some with clear beginnings and ends and with clear meanings.
I made the mistake of trying to work actively on my intentions in thisphase, but it wasn’t really possible. I wasted a lot of time and visions this way, I am afraid and I can’t believe I was that stupid cause i knew that during thisphase I should just sit back and allow the visions to come. Anyway, I made it through the death-
InthemorningMike and Sander brought some fruit and made us take a few steps on the floor (assisted).Then it was time for the nextphase -
When we shared intentions at the beginning of the seremony i spoke of my desire to meet especially my mother and mothers father but also my father and the rest of my dead grandparents (not to mention Jesus and Buddha). Mike then said that many came with such intentions and many returned dissapointed. And indeed, i saw nothing of Jesus or Buddha or most of my passed loved ones, but i did speak to my mother and grandfather, but it was not like they came to visit me from another dimension, rather that i could interact with a version of them i had stored both consciously and unconsciously. But it was still way up there on the coolness scale and enormously helpfull to get closure on some personal stuff.
Another thing i experienced in this phase was the ability to meet myself as a kid. This was amazing and gave me a liberating feeling beyond belief. It felt like i could step into myself as a child and feel and see what he felt and saw, feeling 100% how he was in his essense, but at the same time with an objective distance -
So i worked on my intentions in this phase and several revelations appeared. Much of it still not clear, so i wont touch it here.
One thing i want to share though, but i am not exactly sure if it went on in death-
Another thing up the same alley; i was able to gaze down at my self as i lay in the bed, it only lasted a short while though.
What else? I got answers, i got explanations and i got visions, one of wich i thought i would share with you today, but there is to little time and i am too tired. Thats a thing, my energy level have gone up and down since Iboga, but thats quite normal. So vision is shared tomorrow, but i hope it will be worth the wait.
After the in-
I was a bit worried about it since the german guy snored like a mad-
It was not my intention to kick him out, just adjust his position. That said, the room was now suddenly filled with a tremendous quiet peaceful feeling that wasnt there before.
The night came and i slept deeply. Woke up a couple of times, but fell asleep again. I dreamt but couldnt remember them.
When i finally woke up and was ready to get out of bed i had this feeling of peace and quiet in my head and body that was incredebly pleasent. I cant remember ever feeling like this. It was 100% calm-
To a certain degree i can still reach this state, not perfect, but the stillness is still there and it feels great.
I feel different nowant it has been two months since the experience.I am more in my own energy and dont get so affected by the energy if others. This is great for me as other people could sometimes exhaust me.
I have touched upon it before, but i also feel more love for myself.
I have a better understanding an feeling of whats important in life.
I am less afraid of death (i did not feel this as a big thing for me before though) and more in love with life.
All in all a fantastic experience for me.
What ifound a bitwas to avoid any substance for 2 months. No problem with drugs or alcohol, but green tea (Caffeine) and snus (nicotine)wasa struggle, especially snus. But the first 2-
I am thinking of returning next year for another great experience. Thanks Sander and Mike for being such generous souls. A lot of love and respect to you both!